


to touch the face of the stars

by Iris_Duncan_72



Category: Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Non-Famous, Broken Families, Clothed Sex, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, I Don't Even Know, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, M/M, Magic, Minor Violence, Temporary Character Death, That's a lie, The Author Regrets Everything, The Author Regrets Nothing, Touch-Starved, What Have I Done, homphobic language, just a lil bit, kind of, mysterious bullshit abounds, only briefly because homophobes deserve Death
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-19
Updated: 2020-01-19
Packaged: 2021-02-27 10:55:59
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 11,580
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22265977
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Iris_Duncan_72/pseuds/Iris_Duncan_72
Summary: Jisung drifts through life like a kite without a tether. Then he finds Felix.
Relationships: Han Jisung | Han/Lee Felix
Comments: 47
Kudos: 237
Collections: Jilix





	to touch the face of the stars

**Author's Note:**

> glancingly influenced by jennifer armentrout's lux books and the witch mountain films & title from loreena mckennitt (again).
> 
> ps i had no idea what was happening plot-wise or detail-wise or anything-wise until the end so if it reads like its drunk, well... you've been warned.

Jisung found Felix under a full moon on the slopes of the floodplain.

The night was cool and cloudless, stars gleaming like crushed diamonds in the sky, the moon painting everything silver-grey. It was late, but Jisung had stayed out later. His skin felt tight and his head ached, full of too many thoughts, too many feelings, too many sensations, so he traced a familiar route along the top of the slope around the plains, scuffing his worn trainers in the dirt, and that was when he saw it. An area of disturbed ground, the small grasses crumpled and the crumbling earth rucked up, and skid marks like someone had fallen down the hillside. It had to have been a person, the disturbance was too big for a smaller animal.

He was loathe to break the peace and stillness of the night with his voice, so Jisung peered down onto the plain, concerned that whoever had fallen might still be here. Shadows clung to everything and lay thicker than velvet curtains, however, and he couldn't see much of anything. With a quiet sigh, he crouched and cautiously shuffled his way down the slope, clinging to scraggly shrubs to keep himself from slipping. On flat ground once more, Jisung resumed looking, picking his way between the cracked rocks and plantlife -

_There_. Tucked up against the side of a small boulder, lying awkwardly, was a distinctly androgynous person who looked about his age.

Jisung's breath whooshed out of him, heartrate picking up. He approached hesitantly, seriously hoping the person wasn't dead. There wasn't any blood or broken skin, so maybe not. In fact, if it wasn't for their unnatural position, Jisung might think they were sleeping. He sank onto his haunches and tentatively reached out to press his fingers to the person's wrist, their arm thrown above their head. A pulse fluttered beneath Jisung's touch, surprisingly fast for someone who wasn't awake.

Brow furrowing, Jisung glanced at their shadowy face again and _oh_. Eyes like the night sky stared back at him, so wide. They had no whites, no pupil that Jisung could make out, only diamonds on velvet. The eyes blinked and the stars were gone, the colour suddenly pale, pale, pale, the exact hue impossible to tell in this light.

Jisung gasped in shock and fell backwards onto his butt, his pulse a pounding drum in his ears.

The person was just as startled, and frightened too. They scrambled into an upright position, hissing when they knocked their head against the rock, then recoiling when Jisung instinctively jerked towards them.

Jisung froze, mind racing a mile a minute. He took in how slender they were, how the simple shirt and trousers they wore seemed two sizes too big for them at least. How the person curled up to make themself as small as possible, how their arms wrapped around themself not like they were cold but like they was expecting to need to defend themself. Horror, alarm, grief, anger, they all rippled through Jisung in a whiplash of emotion.

'I won't hurt you,' he promised, voice scratchy and low with disuse. He lifted his hands, showing them to be empty. 'I won't hurt you.'

They flinched at his voice, but seemed to be listening, those pale eyes unblinking.

'Humans lie,' was the unexpected reply, the person's voice soft and husky. 'Do you lie to me?'

Jisung did not dwell on the strange words, simply shook his head hard. 'I mean it. I won't hurt you.'

They tilted their head back slightly, presumably to look up at the sky, though it was hard to tell with such uniform colouring of their eyes. 'The stars shine bright for you,' they said, their tone one of quiet wonderment. 'Tell me your name.'

'Jisung.' The word fell from his tongue easily. He did not want this odd stranger to be scared of him.

'Hmm.' They curled up smaller still, knees up by their chin. 'If you truly do not mean me harm... then will you help me, Jisung?'

Jisung nodded without hesitation. In this moment, when time seemed to stand still and a person with pale eyes watched him, there was no reason to say no. 'What do you need?' he asked. 'If you come home with me, I can get you a phone to call someone or -'

'You would invite me into your home?' Their voice lifted up in surprise. 'You do not even know my name, Jisung.'

His brows pinching together again, Jisung countered, 'You're all alone out here and it's dark and cold. Of course I'll invite you home.'

'It is not dark,' they said, uncurling one cautious hand to reach out of the rock's shadow into the moonlight. 'The sky has many eyes and they are clear and strong tonight.'

Jisung pursed his lips, trying to think how to respond to that. He opted for a safer line of inquiry. 'How did you get here? Where do you come from?'

They smiled, small and devastatingly sad. 'Ask me another,' they replied.

So Jisung tried again. 'What is your name, then?'

The smile brightened a little. 'Felix.'

'There we go, I know your name now. Would you like to come home with me, Felix? No-one will hurt you there. You can call whoever you need to and get some sleep and in the morning, I can guide you into town, if you want.'

Finally, Felix blinked, their strange eyes obscured by thin lids for a moment. 'No-one will hurt me there,' they repeated, sounding very much like they was trying to reassure themself.

Jisung's heart cracked that Felix would need to do such a thing. 'No-one,' he said firmly. 'I promise.'

'I will believe you,' Felix said quietly.

Slowly, Jisung stood up, not wanting to startle his new companion. 'Come on, then. It's not far away.'

Felix was even slower to stand, their every move uncertain and wary. At full height they were about level with Jisung but their body was so lean that they seemed smaller. Jisung noticed their feet were bare and inhaled sharply.

'Are you alright to walk?' he asked, worried at the state Felix's feet might be in, especially if they'd done much walking. 'Do you want my shoes?'

Felix cocked their head, quizzical. 'Why would I want your shoes?'

Jisung blinked, puzzled by their confusion. 'Because, uh, well, the ground is rough and there are lots of sharp little rocks which might hurt you.'

'Oh.' Felix sounded like they had not considered this before. Another oddity to add to this night of strange things. 'The ground does not hurt my feet,' they said at last. 'I do not need shoes.'

Well, who was Jisung to question that? He simply nodded and started walking back to the slope at the edge of the plains. 'This way.'

And so Jisung returned, with Felix in tow, to the little house on the plateau above the floodplains, the lights out and his parents asleep. They crept in through the window Jisung had left open, his room at the back of the house. Felix didn't ask why they weren't using a door, simply followed Jisung's lead. Once inside, Jisung switched on the string of fairy lights he had hanging on the wall above his bed; there seemed no need for any more light. He turned around, seeing Felix standing by the window, one hand still resting on the sill, those pale eyes turned in Jisung's direction.

'Do you want a phone? Is there someone you can call?' These were sensible questions to ask but Jisung felt like he knew the answer even before Felix said it.

Felix shook their head, unkempt dark hair curling around their face. 'I cannot call my family with a phone.'

Curiosity piqued at the odd phrasing, Jisung offered, 'The Internet, then? Or... something else?'

Felix hunched in on themself a little, chin dropping. 'I cannot call them yet.'

Oh. Maybe they were a runaway. Jisung could understood that - his nightly walks only ended after he successfully convinced himself to return home.

'Okay,' he said easily. 'Do you want to sleep? Or - is there anything else you need? Are you hurt? Hungry?'

Pale eyes regarded him for a long minute with no reply. Then: 'I need to rest. It's been - a while.'

They sounded so very weary and Jisung's heart squeezed in sympathy.

'Here.' He gestured to his bed, which took up half the small room's space. 'Sleep here.'

'And where will you sleep, Jisung? Humans like their beds.'

Why did they say it like that? Like - they weren't human? Although, to be fair, Jisung had never met a human with eyes like Felix's. He wasn't going to ask the obvious question, though. Felix hardly looked ready for an interrogation.

'I'll be fine,' he answered. 'I don't mind sleeping on the floor. I can use my clothes as blankets.'

'But... it's your bed.'

Jisung shrugged, already pulling open his drawers for a thicker jumper. 'You're my guest. Plus, you _do_ look like you could do with a decent night's rest.'

Hesitantly, Felix moved over to the bed, running their hands over the blankets. 'It's so soft.'

Jisung stared. The blankets were old and closer to coarse than soft. Had Felix never touched one before? Beyond confused, he layered up, then sat on the floor and arranged his winter jacket as a pillow. He lay down, hands stuffed in his sleeves, looking up at the ceiling without really seeing it, and heard Felix getting into his bed.

A bare minute had passed when Felix muttered, 'I'm too hot,' and there was a _whoosh_ before Jisung's quilt suddenly appeared in his line of sight and flopped over him.

Started, he pushed it off his face and sat up, turning to the bed. Felix stared right back at him, defiance in the set of their mouth and shoulders. Neither of them said anything more and, eventually, Jisung gave in, slowly lying back down and draping the quilt over his legs. It took him a while to relax, but at last his mind quieted enough for him to drift off to sleep.

Felix was still there when Jisung woke, which admittedly he'd only been half-expecting. He left the stranger sleeping in his curled up ball halfway under the blankets and slipped out of his room, leaving the door ajar, before heading down the hall to the front of the house. It was early but the house was quiet, his parents already having left for work, so he walked confidently into the kitchen. What would Felix want to eat? Jisung had no idea.

He'd just decided to pour himself a glass of milk and throw some bread in the toaster when he heard a low voice calling his name softly, fearfully, from the direction of his room.

_Shit._

Slamming the fridge shut, Jisung nearly tripped into a wall as he raced back to the hall and flung open his door. Felix, sitting up in bed, jolted at Jisung's sudden arrival, but then they relaxed out of their hunched position. Their blinked wide pale eyes at Jisung, who was struggling to remember how to form words, partly because of his sudden rush but mostly because Felix was utterly ethereal by daylight, what the _fuck._ Fair skin (were those freckles? Were they _really??_ ), plush lips, pert nose, heavy locks of blue-black hair framing their narrow face - and of course those huge shimmering eyes.

'Are you alright?' he managed to squeak out past the crushing realisation that apparently he'd picked up an angel on the floodplain last night.

Felix dipped their head. 'You weren't here,' they explained, twisting the hem of a blanket between their fingers. 'I - I thought you might have left me.'

Oh, wow. Now Jisung felt like the _biggest_ asshole on the planet and all he'd done was go looking for breakfast.

'I'm sorry,' he said honestly. 'I didn't know - I didn't think you were about to wake up. I was just getting some food. I wouldn't leave you.'

The cheesiness of the words ought to have made them both cringe but instead they seemed to be exactly what Felix was after because they sighed, shoulders slumping in relief.

'I believe you,' Felix assured him. 'You said you would not hurt me and you have not, so you must be a trustworthy human. I have not found many like you.'

Jisung pinched the bridge of his nose. He hadn't even had his morning glass of milk and already the weird angel person was being weird. Frankly, that could wait until after breakfast.

'Do you want anything to eat?' he asked, for lack of anything better to say.

Felix cocked their head to one side, considering. 'Yes. I'm hungry.'

'Alright, follow me.'

Breakfast was an interesting affair. Felix didn't seem very familiar with any of the foods Jisung offered them and in the end they settled for what he himself was having - milk and toast. They loved the milk, downing an entire glass in the time it took Jisung to turn on the toaster, but found the toast terribly dry. About to suggest they put a spread of some kind on it, Jisung nearly choked on his tongue in horror when Felix simply dipped the toast in their second glass of milk, making happy little noises in their throat as they bit into it again.

Felix noted his reaction and paused, about to dip the toast into their drink again. 'Is this... wrong?'

Jisung seriously couldn't stand how hesitant they looked, so he repressed a sigh and shook his head. 'No, no, um, you're fine. That - that's how some people eat toast, yes.'

Still looking unsure, Felix's gaze dropped to the untainted toast in Jisung's hand, the movement only visible due to their eyelashes. Realising what Felix wanted him to do, Jisung _almost_ cracked. Steeling his spine and bracing his taste buds, he forced himself to copy their actions, taking a bite out of milk-soaked toast like he hadn't just committed blasphemy. He was rewarded with a shy smile from Felix, however, and suddenly he didn't mind quite so much.

When they were halfway through their third glass of milk, Jisung leaned against the kitchen counter between them, arms folded, gaze intent.

'So,' he began. 'You don't want to call anyone, right? Okay. Where are you going, then? I can drop you off somewhere, if that would help.'

Felix lowered their glass, expressionless. Their shoulders were hunching in again. 'I am not... going somewhere,' they replied haltingly. 'I am... getting away. Escaping.'

Oh.

'Where do you _want_ to go, then?'

'Home.'

Jisung frowned. 'Why can't you go there? Where is your home?'

Felix had curled in on themself now, arms wrapped around their middle. 'Far away from here,' they whispered sadly. 'Far, far away from here.'

They looked completely miserable and Jisung's hands itched with the need to help, to make this better.

'Is - is there anything I can do? To help you get back home?'

Felix's head whipped up and Jisung squeaked as they pinned him in place with those pearlescent eyes.

'It will be dangerous,' they said seriously. Almost sombre. 'Helping me is very dangerous.'

Jisung swallowed, repressing a shiver that threatened to ripple over him. 'Why?'

Felix did not blink. 'Because they will come for me. I escaped but the humans in the black suits and the humans in the white masks will come for me again. They know I am - not like you and they want my secrets.'

What.

The.

_Fuck._

This was some Men in Black type shit. Only Felix didn't look like they were joking, their expression haunted and grave.

Very slowly licking his dry lips, Jisung managed to croak, 'And if I help you hide from them? Or - or get away from them? Will you be able to go home then?'

Felix watched him closely, silently, for several breaths that felt like hours. 'Yes,' they relented. 'Then I will be able to go home.'

'Okay. Okay.' God, what the _fuck._ 'Tell me how to help you, Felix.'

Suddenly, Jisung was very glad he hadn't asked them who (or what) they were earlier. He got the feeling they wouldn't appreciate the question in the slightest, funny enough. And yeah, that was a seriously weird thought, and yeah, he was two tenths of an inch from going into cardiac arrest or a catatonic state, but so what. So goddamn _what_. If he was this close to a mental breakdown, Felix had to be a hell of a lot closer, which meant Jisung had no excuse to do anything other than _cope_. And he would. Felix, the maybe-probably-definitely-not-quite-human he'd invited into his house last night, needed help and as Jisung was going to do his damndest to pull through, even with the threat of the men in suits showing up. What did Jisung have to lose, really?

'Let me stay here with you,' Felix said. 'Hide me when they come.'

That sounded fine except - 'If they know you're here, how can I hide you?'

Felix shook their head. 'Tell them I _was_ here, but that I left. That will explain the trace I leave.'

Jesus. They were really being hunted.

'But that won't work if you really are still here, will it? Surely if they're following your, uh, trace, it'll be stronger where you are.'

Felix hummed and rocked in their seat, looking away. 'I have tricked them before. I can trick them again.'

And that was that.

Jisung took Felix into town with him that day. Between the two of them, they'd cleared out the house's milk supplies and besides, it was about time for a food run. The town straddled the line between being an actual town and a village and it resided on the far side of the floodplains, up on a huge plateau that protected it from the river. The people who lived there were like the town itself - small-minded, closed off, keeping to themselves.

Jisung loved the land he lived on, loved the raw beauty of Nature's wilderness that surrounded his home, but _god_ did he loathe the people. As far as they were concerned, anyone who wasn't like them in mind, spirit, and body was untrustworthy, someone to be looked down on. He supposed there was something bleakly amusing about the ease with which his parents interacted with the township - while he couldn't get on with any of them. Not for lack of trying.

He caught a glimpse of himself and Felix in the big security monitors at the entrance of the supermarket and nearly snorted at how different they looked. Jisung, scruffy and sun-browned, and Felix, slim and pale but for their shock of black hair. He'd given them a t-shirt and a pair of shorts to wear instead of their plain grey clothes, but they'd refused any shoes. Somehow, they still weren't bleeding, so that was something. Jisung had also fretted about their eyes - there was no way to disguise them - but Felix had just smiled faintly and told him not to worry. Easier said than done, of course, but given the amount of trust they were putting in him, Jisung thought he ought to trust them as well.

So, here they were, armed with canvas bags and a list.

'I don't suppose you know your way around a supermarket, do you?' Jisung asked, steering them towards the fresh produce aisle.

Felix blinked owlishly at him. 'No,' they mumbled, sticking very close to him. If anything, they seemed a bit overwhelmed.

'Okay, don't worry about it,' he hurried to reassure them. He wondered if patting them on the arm would help, or even be welcome, but decided against it. 'Supermarkets aren't scary.'

They completed the shop briskly, the only momentary alarm being when Felix reached for the bottle of milk to crack open the lid and Jisung squawked, shooing their hands away and trying to explain that they couldn't do that yet. Felix looked puzzled, but they left the milk alone. At the checkout, the woman scanning their items raised pursed her lips, unimpressed, as she glanced between the two of them and Jisung's hackles rose automatically. Fortunately, she didn't say anything, and the pair were able to escape the shop without incident.

Trouble, however, was waiting outside.

Jisung suddenly stopped in his tracks and Felix almost walked on alone, before turning back. They opened their mouth to ask a question but Jisung was already hissing at them to keep quiet as he deliberately stepped in front of them.

'Han! I should've known you were in town - there's a disgusting stink in the air.'

The charming comment came from the leader of a trio of young men, all a bit older than Jisung and all taller and beefier than him. The trio stopped and formed a hulking human barricade on the pavement before Jisung and Felix, greasy and sneering and cruel. They were all sons of the town's most well-to-do citizens, which basically meant they had free licence to do anything they liked - including hassling Jisung anytime he was unfortunate enough to run into them.

'Maddox,' Jisung greeted, upper lip curling. 'Strange, I thought the smell was _you.'_

Maddox scoffed, while the lankier of his cronies, Brett, said childishly, 'Still being a good little Mummy's boy, are you?' and gestured at the full canvas bags.

Jisung raised his brows disdainfully. 'It's called "getting hungry", not that you'd -'

'And who's this?' Maddox interrupted, taking a step forward to ogle at Felix, who was obediently standing behind Jisung. 'Haven't seen you before.'

Shifting slightly so he was firmly between Felix and Maddox, Jisung glared fiercely, his shoulders tightening in anticipation of a fight. 'Piss off and leave them alone.'

Maddox rocked back on his heels and whistled. 'Ooh, touchy today, Han.'

'What's he, then - your boyfriend?' Chase, the third asshole, jeered. 'Fucking fags.'

Jisung flushed with rage, feeling his hands twitch around the bag handles. 'Fuck. _Off.'_

'Or what?' Maddox stepped closer, making as though to go around Jisung, who promptly blocked him. 'He can speak for himself, can't he?'

'Hey, new guy,' Brett said loudly. 'It's polite to answer when your betters ask a question.'

'Right, we're leaving,' Jisung spat, backing up and pushing Felix with him, not looking away from the scumbags in front of him.

But Maddox growled, 'I don't think so,' and lunged forward, seizing Jisung's wrist in a bruising grip, and panic bit _deep_ -

_'Fuck!'_

Jisung stared in astonishment, his pulse a pounding drum in his head, as Maddox was violently shoved backwards, Jisung's arm ripped from his grasp. Only nothing had visibly touched him. Brett and Chase made noises of alarmed confusion, hauling a swearing Maddox to his feet again.

_'Do not touch Jisung.'_

Jisung whipped around and his heart nearly stopped when he saw Felix, their beautiful face contorted in a vicious snarl, every muscle in their body locked as they leaned towards the trio.

'What the hell?' Chase yelped, disbelief and fear painted brightly across his face.

'You fucking freak, I'll kill you!' Maddox shouted.

He rushed at them and Jisung reached for Felix, seeking to drag them out of the way, to keep them safe - but then their eyes shone like molten silver and Maddox was thrown ten feet sideways onto the cracked carpark tarmac. Chase and Brett couldn't get away fast enough, both of them yelling terrified insults as beat a hasty retreat, dragging a still-cursing Maddox with them. All the commotion was starting to draw attention and Jisung laid a hesitant hand on Felix's arm.

'Felix, we need to go.'

They didn't move, staring after the three men with deadly intent.

'Felix,' Jisung implored. 'Just leave them. They won't come near you again.'

Pale, glowing eyes turned in his direction and goosebumps rippled over his skin.

'And will they come near you again, Jisung?' The question was asked in a familiarly husky voice, nothing like the rumbling thunder that they'd used before.

Jisung blinked. 'Well. They might, but probably not for a while. It doesn't matter, we need to leave before we attract any more attention. You're mean to be laying low, remember?'

Felix pursed their lips, considering his argument. Then they nodded. 'Yes, I remember. We can go now.'

The walk home was overlaid with a stifling silence that seemed to magnify every footfall, every shift of the bags, every breath to a hundred times its normal volume. Jisung's goosebumps refused to go away and he felt too hot, his mind a messy blur of half-formed thoughts and sharp flashes of emotion as the showdown with Maddox and his cronies replayed itself on a loop. This was why Felix was being hunted, then, or at least part of the reason.

'Are you still going to help me?'

The sudden question startled Jisung and he barely avoided tripping on a stone. He shot Felix a confused look. 'Of course. Why wouldn't I?'

They stopped abruptly, staring at him with wide, unblinking eyes. 'You're not scared of me?'

Jisung inhaled sharply. 'No,' he answered firmly. 'It was, um, very surprising to see what you are capable of, but you didn't use it against me. You - you protected me.'

A scowl darkened Felix's expression. 'They would have hurt you if I hadn't. You are not very strong, Jisung.'

Okay, rude. Deciding not to comment on the ruthless blow to his ego, Jisung instead said, 'Yeah, they would have hurt me. Um. Thank you for stopping them.' He cleared his throat awkwardly, glancing away. 'I guess I'm not doing such a great job of looking after you, huh.'

'That is a lie,' Felix immediately countered. 'You have let me sleep in your bed and you have given me milk and you have not hurt me.'

Christ, did they not realise how low a bar that was to set?

'Felix, _no-one_ should hurt you. It's an awful, terrible thing to hurt someone and me _not_ doing it doesn't automatically make me great, okay?' Jisung truly hated that this was something he even needed to explain.

'But humans always hurt me,' Felix replied, sounding so horribly calm about this that it just made it a thousand times worse. 'Only you haven't. Only you.'

And _this_ would be why humankind, in Jisung's humble opinion, deserved to burn in hell for the rest of time.

'I wanted to hurt those humans,' Felix continued in the same matter-of-fact tone. 'Does that make me awful and terrible, Jisung?'

Jisung shook his head, struggling to speak past the tide of his seething emotions. 'No. That wasn't - that was defensive. They _chose_ to come and cause trouble. Defending yourself or other people isn't bad.'

Felix seemed to consider Jisung's words and then, wordless, they resumed walking back to the house. The silence was a little lighter now.

Jisung's parents returned not long after sunset. They did not call out to him and announce their arrival; it'd been many years since they'd done that. Felix and Jisung were holed up in his room, but they'd been about to go to the kitchen for dinner. Now, Jisung hesitated.

'Stay here,' he told Felix. 'My parents won't come down here, so if you stay quiet, they won't know you're here. I'll go and get some food.'

Felix nodded, amenable enough, and sat on the bed to wait.

Taking a fortifying breath, Jisung left the room and made his way down the hall again. He saw his mother and father sitting in the main room talking to each other, both with a glass of red wine. Neither of them looked up when he paused by the doorway, nor gave any indication that they were aware of his presence. Jisung swallowed the lump in his throat with practised ease and went into the kitchen to microwave two bowls of ramyun. He was glad that the screaming arguments of times gone past had stopped, but sometimes he found himself longing for even those. At least then, his parents had acknowledged his existence.

Subdued, Jisung returned to his room with the steaming ramyun bowls.

Felix was appropriately intrigued by the new food and Jisung had to stop them trying to tip the whole thing into their mouth as soon as he handed their bowl over. They were frustratingly unconcerned about the heat but Jisung was firm in his instructions that they take it slowly. Then, of course, there was the fact that they'd never used chopsticks before. After their third failed attempt at using them, Jisung was sorely tempted to go and get a fork but he'd heard his parents move to the kitchen and he decided against it.

'The ramyun is not very hot now,' Felix said, breaking Jisung out of his reverie just in time to see them pick up the bowl with both hands again.

'No!' he yelped, carefully forcing it back down. 'Even if it's not really hot, you'll probably spill liquid everywhere and choke on the noodles.' Inspiration struck and he felt his cheeks reddening as he reached for their chopsticks, scooped up a mouthful of noodles, and held it over the bowl. 'Here, I'll help you.'

Felix blinked in mild surprise, but to Jisung's eternal relief and gratitude they made no comment, simply dipped their head and accepted the offering. They made approving noises as they chewed, tongue darting out to lick a speck of liquid from their chin, and Jisung took the chance to hastily stuff some noodles in his own mouth. Between Felix's enthusiasm and Jisung's grumbling stomach, it did not take long for both their bowls to be emptied, with Jisung feeding Felix all of theirs. It was, he reasoned, hardly the weirdest thing that had happened in the past twenty four hours.

When they were done, Felix leaned back against the wall behind the bed and sighed contentedly. It was always hard to tell what their pale eyes were looking at, but given the way the skin on his nape suddenly prickled, Jisung would be willing to bet they were looking at him.

'Are you sad, Jisung?'

Jisung stalled, chopsticks halfway down to his now-empty bowl. 'Huh?'

'You were sad when you brought the food back.'

Oh.

'I don't want to talk about it,' he muttered, stacking the bowls and putting them near the door.

'Then you _are_ sad.'

Jisung huffed, his back to the bed. 'It's an upsetting topic. Please don't ask me about it.'

Felix lapsed into silence again.

It was only late evening at most but Jisung felt drained. He couldn't remember the last time he'd gone to sleep before midnight but he reckoned he could manage it tonight. Unable to bring himself to leave the haven of his bedroom again, he popped a mint as a poor substitute for brushing his teeth and started setting up his bed on the floor again. The quilt Felix had generously given him last night would suffice in place of a mattress and he'd sourced a spare blanket from the linen closet to wrap himself in.

'I'm tired so I'm going to sleep now,' Jisung told Felix. 'You don't have to -'

'I will sleep, too.'

So that was that. A couple of minutes later, darkness and quiet had draped themselves over the small room. Faint light from the not-yet-risen moon provided some illumination, enough that Jisung could trace the lines of his ceiling as he lay on his back, listening to the smooth sound of Felix's breathing.

He waited until he was sure they were asleep before whispering, 'I am sad. I don't know how to stop being sad. I hate the people here and they hate me. Even -' he swallowed thickly - 'even my parents. Everything I do just makes it worse... I _am_ sad, but mostly I'm - I'm lonely and that... that hurts worse.'

It took him a minute to get his breathing under control again, forcing back the tears that rose so easily under cover of night.

Then there was a rustling sound from the bed, a creak of the mattress, and the padding of light feet on the floorboards as Felix came to lie next to him, draping the duvet over them both. Jisung turned his head and saw their eyes shining dimly, strangely comforting instead of unnerving.

Their breath tickled his face as they whispered, 'I don't hate you, Jisung.'

A soft hand found his under the blankets and he didn't stop them from sliding their fingers between his.

Jisung rolled over so that he faced them. 'I don't hate you either, Felix.'

They squeezed his hand. 'Good.'

Side by side, the pair fell asleep.

Jisung woke to the sensation of all-encompassing warmth. He didn't question it, just sighed happily and snuggled down, feeling strong arms tighten around him.

Wait. Arms?

The thought niggled at him, slowly piercing the layers of fuzz clouding his mind, until he was forced to crack open an eye to find out what was going on. The blue of a familiar old t-shirt of his filled his narrow line of sight and his brain had to tick over for a minute, deciphering what that meant. Then he remembered that he'd given the shirt to Felix. They were wearing it. Which meant Jisung's face was pressed against their chest and their arms were the ones wrapped around him, cuddling him close, and that was their knee nudged between his.

Huh.

Jisung had a vague thought that he ought to be freaking out and pulling away, but for the life of him he couldn't think why. He was so warm. Had he _ever_ been this warm? It was a delicious experience and he could feel his bones melting more by the second.

Felix hummed, a low, sleepy sound, flexing their muscles in a slight stretch against Jisung's body as they rose to consciousness. This left Jisung feeling strangely breathless, the comforting security of their hold a dizzying pleasure. Experimentally, he tightened his own limbs, fingers digging into Felix's back, thighs squeezing Felix's knee, his head nuzzling their chest. His heart thudded heavily at his own daring, skipping a beat when Felix hummed again, the sound one of deep satisfaction.

'Jisung,' they murmured, chest vibrating against him.

Scrounging up the strength to speak, Jisung whispered, 'Felix.'

A concerned little thread wormed its way around Jisung's heart. Were they angry at him for this? Would they push him away now? He clutched them closer on instinct, every fibre in his being begging them to let him stay here.

Felix huffed and he felt their breath stir his hair. 'I'm not going anywhere,' they muttered. 'Calm down.'

Startled at having been found out, Jisung tensed, anxiousness digging in sharp roots. Then he squeaked in alarm as Felix suddenly moved, rolling Jisung onto his back, pushing their knee down till it rested on the ground and they could loom over him. They rested some of their weight on an elbow, their arm curved around Jisung's head, but he was still quite firmly pinned to the ground. His mouth was dry as dust as he stared up at them, long ink-black locks framing their unreadable eyes, the pearly hue glowing in the early morning light.

'Do you want me to move away, Jisung?' they asked quietly.

'No,' he replied at once, his tone hushed.

'Then I will not. So stop worrying.'

'Why?' He could not hold back the question, though he loathed how desperate he sounded. 'Why are you doing this?'

'What am I doing?' they countered, unblinking.

Jisung felt the hand they had on his back slide out from under him to rest on the curve of his waist, warm and distracting. His cheeks burned as he whispered, 'Touching me. Holding me like I - like I mean something.'

Felix settled their weight more squarely on him. 'You _do_ mean something, Jisung. I see so many bruises that you carry within, delivered by your own people, but still you are kind to me. I trust you. I want... to know you.'

His lungs were devoid of air, though more because of their words than the weight of their body. 'And - and when you know me?' he breathed. 'When you have learned all there is to be learned about me?'

'Then you will know me, too, and you will have a decision to make.'

Jisung swallowed with difficulty. 'What decision?'

Felix smiled faintly and shook their head slowly. 'Do you wish to know me, Jisung? Will you let me know you?'

There were layers to their questions, hidden depths that Jisung could barely glimpse, but he was _so_ warm and more content than he had in the longest time. He had never felt so connected, so at ease, so _seen_ with someone else - and Felix wasn't even human. There was only one answer he could possibly give.

Jisung pressed his hands against the dip of their spine, holding them close, and said, 'Yes. I want to know you, Felix. I want you to know me.'

Felix's cheeks creased, their eyes narrowing and white teeth gleaming as they beamed down at him, and Jisung's stomach swooped. They lowered their head, strands of dark hair tickling his cheeks, and those beautiful eyes asked a silent question. Jisung let his lips part and lashes flutter down in reply. The hum that rumbled through Felix's chest was akin to a purr and they squeezed his waist as they brushed their mouth over his. Acting completely on instinct, Jisung arched up into them, his tongue flicking out to moisten his lips and catching Felix's, too. Felix exhaled and kissed Jisung firmly, before he could do something daft like apologise. A whimper built in his throat and he lifted a hand to twine with their hair, anchoring himself against their lean body.

Teeth sank into Jisung's lower lip, tugging with gentle insistence, and Jisung relaxed his jaw, opening his mouth on a sigh. Felix's tongue, hot and wet, slipped inside, questing, dragging over the roof of Jisung's mouth, over his teeth, over his own tongue. When Felix withdrew, they parted from him barely long enough to gasp for air before pressing close again, humming when Jisung's grip on them tightened and he rolled their lip between his teeth, suckling at it. They groaned quietly and fire arced through Jisung's blood, his kisses becoming messier, saliva smearing across skin and dripping between their mouths.

There was a hunger in Jisung, one that pounded to the beat of his racing heart, that breathed through the slide of damp skin on damp skin, that sang in the bite of fingers against clothed flesh. It was utterly intoxicating and he was so caught up in it he didn't realise how provocatively he was squirming under Felix until they hitched their thigh higher between his legs. A full-body shiver ripped through Jisung and he threw his head back, a shrill whine escaping him. Felix laughed softly, the hand on his waist shifting to his hip where it held him down with a strength Jisung wouldn't have thought their slender body capable of. Felix rocked their thigh up again and Jisung's hands flew to their shoulders, clinging as he whimpered. He sought their gaze, found shining pale eyes already watching him like a hawk, making him shudder even before they moved their thigh a third time.

'Felix,' he panted, desperate. 'Felix.'

They dipped their head to kiss him again, open-mouthed and sloppy, then nudged his nose with theirs. 'I have you, Jisung.'

Jisung's chest heaved with a dry sob, his emotions overwhelmingly powerful, the sensations within him too much to process. His eyes fluttered shut briefly and he cupped the back of Felix's head, knocking their foreheads together, a choked noise crawling up his throat as Felix rocked against him again.

'Felix,' he begged, voice cracking halfway through the name, 'Felix, please - _please_ -'

'So sensitive,' Felix cooed, holding him fast when he tried to simultaneously wriggle closer and away. Their lips brushed his ear and they murmured, 'Who has seen you like this? Who have you shared this part of yourself with? _Tell me._ '

The sudden streak of possessiveness was so unexpectedly arousing that Jisung nearly came on the spot.

'No-one,' he gasped. 'N- no-one. Only y- you.'

There'd never been anyone he could trust anywhere near enough. Until Felix.

He felt them grin against his throat. 'My gain,' they purred. 'You are beautiful, Jisung.'

Jisung coughed out another sob, his entire body a tautly strung bow, Felix's words tantalising, teasing, tempting. He couldn't work out what he wanted most right now, but he knew he was going to cry if they didn't - 'Kiss me,' he pleaded.

Silken black hair whispered over his sweaty skin as Felix lifted their head to fulfill his demand and Jisung lost himself in the rhythm of their lips on his, their thigh between his, stoking the fire under his skin hotter and hotter. Then the tension snapped and Jisung's spine arched, pleasure exploding outward from his gut as he moaned into Felix's mouth. They crooned to him, withdrawing their leg when he hissed at the oversensitivity, stroking him down from his high.

Jisung wasn't sure how long passed before the the ringing in his ears faded and the haze over his mind cleared. He blinked lethargically, seeing Felix laying on their side next to him, blue-black hair tousled and plump lips kiss-red, still propped up on an elbow. They smiled lazily at him and he felt a lick of fondness-attraction-hunger stir in his chest.

'Beautiful,' they repeated softly, cupping his jaw and running their thumb over his cheek.

He'd never been called that before and he flushed, leaning into the touch. ''m not really,' he mumbled.

But Felix pressed their thumb to his swollen lips, making his breath hitch, and shook their head. 'You have not seen yourself, Jisung. If you had, you would say that you are beautiful.'

The blush intensified and Jisung shied away from the trembly-happy feelings threatening to bloom within him. He couldn't concentrate with Felix's hands on him so he pushed himself upright, wincing at the stickiness in his shorts. Before he dealt with that, though, he shot Felix a veiled glance and hesitantly began, 'Do you want, um -'

They sat up, too, folded legs nudging his, the silvery colour of their eyes rich and molten. 'Don't worry about me,' they said, lightly squeezing his hands. 'This is about you.'

Jisung gulped and ducked his head, keeping his hands locked with theirs.

'I wanted to know you in this way,' they murmured, 'and it is my honour that you allowed it.' Then they paused, unsure. 'You aren't... displeased -'

'No!' Jisung denied vehemently, head whipping back up. 'No, Felix, that was - that was - _amazing_. I've never done anything like that with someone else. I'm glad it was, um... with you.'

They exhaled, relief wiping the worry from their expression.

Nibbling at his upper lip, Jisung added, 'You mean it, then? That you want to - to know me and I can know you?' He couldn't keep the hope from his voice, his heart aching like a broken rib at the thought of Felix - well, anyone, really, but of _Felix_ permitting him in close.

They nodded, gaze unwavering. 'Yes, Jisung. Before I go home, I will know you and you will know me.'

His stomach clenched unpleasantly at the mention of Felix leaving, but Jisung was well used to being alone and, honestly, he ought to be grateful they thought him worthy of anything at all. That, however, was a worry for another day so he shoved it away. 'Okay,' he said in simple acceptance, and then he closed the distanced between them to kiss Felix as sweetly as he knew how.

They hummed happily, leaning into the soft contact, and did not give chase when he pulled back a moment later, nor when he excused himself to the bathroom shortly thereafter. But their gaze was like a physical weight and Jisung felt it linger on him even after he left the room.

Any tentative hopes Jisung had of a leisurely day spend learning Felix in all the ways they would allow him were dashed before they'd even finished breakfast.

Felix raised their second glass of milk to their mouth and then they froze. It was nothing like a human going still - one moment they were a living, breathing person and the next they were a statue carved from stone. Jisung swore he saw the star-strewn night sky flash across their eyes, but they blinked and their eyes were pale again.

'What's wrong?' Jisung forced himself to ask, aware that there could only be one answer.

Felix set down the glass a little roughly, milk sloshing against the sides. 'They've come. The humans in suits and masks. They're down in the floodplain. I can feel them.' Their voice wavered and an ugly flicker of fear crossed their face.

Nausea churned in Jisung's belly and he promptly regretted having eaten anything. But this wasn't about him now.

Striding around the kitchen bench, he took Felix's hands in his and tamped down his uncertainty as best he could as he declared, 'You're going to be fine, Felix. We'll hide you somewhere, you do what you need to to trick them, and then I'll go out and there and lie till I'm blue in the face. Okay? We can do this. We'll keep you safe.'

Felix swallowed thickly and dipped their head in an anxious nod, inciting a violent surge of protectiveness in Jisung. It steeled his spine, crystalised in his blood - he wouldn't let them down, wouldn't let these humans drag Felix away.

'How much time do we have?' he asked.

'Not long,' Felix muttered, their whole body so stiff and wary. 'I need to hide. Before they're too close. But first -' They refocused their attention on Jisung, wide-eyed gaze sharpening.

Jisung had the sudden distinct impression that he was going to despise the next words out of their mouth.

'First, I have to die.'

Oh yeah, he _hated_ that.

_'What?'_ he demanded, tightening his grip on their hands.

Felix squared their shoulders, gritted their teeth. 'I must. It's the only way that my trace will fade.'

'How the hell - what does that even - how does that work? Will you come back?' Jisung spluttered, appalled.

'If you bring me back,' they replied, sliding off the kitchen stool onto their feet. 'I cannot do this alone.'

'Of course I'll bring you back,' Jisung snapped, indignant that they would question that. 'Anything I have to do, I'll do it.'

They tugged their hands from his, expression sombre. 'Do not say such things lightly, Jisung. You have not heard the price yet.'

'Tell me,' he ordered, walking a thin line between being light-headed with panic and ruthless with focus.

Felix pursed their lips like they were debating _not_ telling him, but they relented after a taut moment. 'It's about energy. I can return but it requires a lot of energy. You are young and healthy so - a year. The cost will be a year of your life.'

'Is that all?' The question tumbled from Jisung's mouth before he was aware of even thinking it and he felt as shocked as Felix looked.

Then they frowned, stepping closer. 'Did you hear me? A _year._ I will steal a _year_ of your life to live again, Jisung.'

'So what?' Apparently there was a third state that was neither panic nor laser focus; one might call it reckless stupidity but to Jisung, this was selflessness and it was the best of himself that he could offer Felix. 'What's a single measly year against your life? Nothing.' He lifted his chin in the face of their fierce scowl. 'I would give you a decade if that was what it cost.'

'No!' Felix shouted, seizing Jisung by the upper arms and holding him tightly. _'No._ You don't get to throw away your life like that. Don't you dare.'

Jisung glared. 'I won't! I need to stay alive to give you a year, don't I?'

Felix barred their teeth at him in a silent snarl and their eyes flickered again, the night sky flashing across pearlescent silver. 'We will discuss this later. I must die now. Where will you hide me? Where is least likely to be looked into?'

'My parents' bedroom,' Jisung replied, and he stalked out of the kitchen.

He faltered only briefly at the door, but Felix's fractious presence at his back emboldened him and he opened it. Childhood memories surfaced the second they walked in and Jisung swept them right back into their vault in the darkest depths of his mind where they belonged. On the far side of the room, past the double bed, his mother had a walk-in closet and he strode over to it, unlatching the door and sliding it back. The small, shadowy space was jam-packed with clothes, making it perfect to hide a body.

'Here.' He moved aside so Felix could enter. 'Now, tell me how to bring you back.'

Felix spun on their heel, expression grim. 'You must place a hand over my heart,' they told him, gesturing to the left side of their chest. 'Against my skin, not the cloth. With your other hand, place your fingertips on my lips. Then recite "I give my time for your breath" nine times. Unless you are due to die within the next year, the exchange will occur then.'

Fuck. They were really doing this.

Jisung's hands twitched and nervous energy skittered under his skin. 'Okay. Okay. This better work,' he blurted, 'or I'll never forgive you.'

Plush lips curved up into a faint smile and they cupped his cheek. 'Thank you for doing this for me, Jisung. Because of you, I have a chance to go home again.'

A lump formed in his throat. The seriousness of what was about to happen, of the trust Felix was about to place in him, settled over him like an icy shroud.

'Okay,' Jisung repeated, barely above a whisper. 'You can - you can d-' His throat closed up and he choked. He couldn't say it.

'You don't have to watch,' Felix offered softly, dropping their hand and stepping further back into the closet.

Jisung shook his head quickly. 'I'm not leaving you alone.' The words were raw, ripped from his core. There could be a knock on the front door right this second and he wouldn't be moving from here, not until this was done.

Felix regarded him silently, then nodded. 'Be careful with the humans, please. They can be... cruel.'

'I will,' he promised.

Accepting his word, Felix sat by a rack of long dresses, then curled up into a little ball on their side. They looked even smaller than when Jisung had first found them. They blinked once, twice, and their eyelids struggled to lift the third time. Their lips parted on a sharp exhalation and then they went limp, sagging into the carpet. Half-open pale eyes darkened to black, a night sky without stars.

'...Felix?'

There was no reply. They were gone.

It hurt more than Jisung expected and for a minute, he just stood there, staring down at Felix's body and trying to remember how to breathe. He was dimly aware of tears sliding unchecked down his cheeks and he let them. He had plenty of pain to spare; why stop some of it escaping? When his chest burned, he sucked in a ragged breath, exhaling it almost immediately as a sob. Jisung bit down on a knuckle to muffle the sounds, crying quietly.

He knew he was overreacting - not only was this death temporary, but he'd only known Felix for, what, a day and a half? They weren't even going to be staying long. He shouldn't be this upset, really. But Jisung remembered their soft lips against his, the way they'd held him so firm and sure, those pale eyes watching him with such trust. He remembered these thing and squeezed his eyes shut, hugging himself tightly as he wept.

But he couldn't stay here forever. There were things to be done. He had a part to play. Felix wasn't safe yet.

So Jisung scrubbed his eyes with the heels of his palms and carefully shut the closet door, before going back to the kitchen. The sight of their half-eaten breakfast almost set him off again and it was only by the narrowest of margins that he didn't burst into tears. Working quickly, he tidied away the things on the counter so it looked as though there had been only one person eating here. He forced himself to take a mouthful of Felix's milk, if only to soothe his aching throat.

Then he sat on a stool and stared blankly at the opposite wall, waiting.

Barely ten minutes later, a knock sounded at the door. Despite himself, Jisung flinched. He licked his lips, exhaled slow and careful, then got up and went to answer it.

A tall woman and a broad man stood on the doorstep. She was in a black pantsuit complete with gloves and sunglasses, her auburn hair pulled back in a severe bun. He wore a white jacket and grey slacks, and sunglasses too. In his breast pocket, there was a slight bulge and Jisung wondered if it was a facemask.

'Good morning,' the woman said crisply. 'I am Dime and this is my colleague, Sterling. We work for a branch of the Federal Bureau of Investigation.' On cue, they both produced ID badges, whipping them up and down so quickly Jisung barely glimpsed the official stamps and seals. 'We believe you have come into contact with a detainee of ours, who escaped our custody two days ago. This is them.' She pulled a phone out of her pocket, unlocked it, and turned it towards Jisung.

Pale eyes set in a too-narrow face above full lips and framed by blue-black hair stared out at him. If Jisung hadn't just seen exactly what Felix looked like when dead, he might've thought the photo was a postmortem one.

He cleared his throat. 'Yeah, I saw them. Felix, they told me their name was.'

Dime returned the phone to her pocket. 'Yes. We have tracked them to this house. Felix is very dangerous, so we must ask that you immediately lead us to them, Mr...?'

'Han. I'm Jisung Han,' he told them. 'And you're too late. Felix was gone when I woke up this morning. I don't know when they left or where they went.'

Sterling cocked his head. 'Felix was staying here, then? When did you come across them?'

'Two nights ago, out on the floodplain,' Jisung replied. 'They didn't hurt me or anything and it was really late, so I invited them back here. Yesterday, they just hung around and came with me into town.' He shrugged, affecting a casual air. 'It gets lonely around here and they didn't know where they were going, so I let them stay another night.'

'It's a relief to hear that they weren't causing trouble, at least,' Sterling said. Maybe he was meant to be the good cop in this scenario. He sounded a lot more relaxed than Dime. 'Please show us where Felix was sleeping, Mr Han. We might find something to help us track them.'

Jisung's palms prickled with sweat but he nodded, opening the door wider and stepping back so the FBI agents (if _any_ part of their story was real) could come in. 'My parents wouldn't have let Felix stay if they knew, so they slept in my room,' he explained, leading the way down the hall and scrupulously keeping his gaze from flicking towards his parents' bedroom.

The quilt and duvet were still on the floor in a tangled mess. Memory of the morning's events whispered through him and Jisung had to work hard to keep his breathing even. Beside him, Sterling fiddled with a rectangular orange box that looked like a cross between a walkie-talkie and a Geiger counter, while Dime walked slowly around the room.

'What's that?' Jisung asked, needing a distraction.

'Ah, this is a unique scanner that I designed specifically for incidents like this one,' Sterling replied. He pushed a button and it beeped, something flashing across the little display screen. 'Yes, Felix was definitely in here.'

Dime turned away from the window before Jisung could respond to that, and he felt her gaze rest on him, cold and cutting. 'You must be very trusting, Mr Han.'

Wary, he asked slowly, 'Why do you say that?'

'I can't think of many people who would trust a stranger they found outside in the middle of the night enough to sleep in the same -' she glanced down at the rumbled blankets - 'room... as them.'

Jisung tried to control his reaction to her words, feeling his face grow hot. 'Felix was hardly threatening. They'd been knocked out by a boulder they hit their head on and they're pretty skinny. What was I going to do - leave them out there?'

Dime tilted her head to one side. 'Perhaps phone the emergency services?'

'They didn't ask for anything like that. I thought maybe they were a runaway.' He clenched his jaw, gaze automatically flicking to the impromptu bed on the floor. 'I thought... they were trustworthy.'

Sterling took his turn around the room, his scanner beeping now and then, but Dime's focus stayed on Jisung. 'And did Felix trust you, Mr Han?'

He knew what she was fishing for. 'Felix left,' he answered coolly. Felix's body, limp and small, blazed in his mind's eye and Jisung hardened his voice. 'Felix _left_ me, Ms Dime or Agent Dime or whoever you are. They left and now I've got the FBI searching my room. Draw your own conclusions.'

She stared at him from behind the shield of her sunglasses and Jisung stared right back.

'Well, Felix certainly isn't here now,' Sterling declared brightly, snapping the tension. 'Their trace is still quite fresh, so they must have gone a couple of hours ago at most.' He glanced at Dime briefly, before turning to Jisung. 'We'll be on our way. Thank you for your cooperation, Mr Han. If Felix gets in touch with you again, please let us know at once.'

Wordlessly, Jisung accepted the simple business card Sterling offered him and nodded. Not quite daring to believe they might be out of the woods just yet, he remained on guard as he led the pair back to the front door.

'Good luck with your search,' he said, as they paused on the doorstep.

Dime and Sterling smiled at the same time and Jisung hadn't realised until this moment that a closed-mouth smile could be so menacing.

'There's no luck to it, Mr Han,' Dime said. 'We always find our quarry, sooner or later.'

'Good day to you,' Sterling finished.

As one, they crossed the turning circle outside the house to where a bulky black SUV (of course) was waiting. They climbed in and a moment later, the vehicle was roaring away up the road.

Jisung made himself wait. He didn't trust those so-called FBI agents as far as he could throw them and even if they didn't specifically suspect him of lying to them, he wouldn't be surprised if they hung around out of sight for a while. So he carried Felix's cold body from the closet into his bedroom, slightly astounded at how light they were. It was like they had hollow bones or something. He laid them on the bed and very gently shut their eyelids, unable to stand seeing those sightless black eyes any longer.

And then he waited.

The day crept along at an absolute snail's pace, naturally, and by late afternoon Jisung was _this_ close to going completely mad. He couldn't leave the bedside for more than two minutes without being swamped with paranoia and he was about ready to crawl out of his own skin.

Enough, he decided, was enough. It _had_ to be enough, because he was at his limit.

Stomach a mess of knots, Jisung sat on the very edge of the bed and looked down at Felix. They didn't look peaceful or like they were asleep. They looked like they weren't there. They looked dead. Jisung was going to change that.

He pushed their t-shirt up and laid a hand over their heart, the tan of his skin in sharp contrast with their snowy colouring. His fingers trembled as he lightly set his fingertips against their lips, the flesh still soft and yielding. Now for the final step.

'I give my time for your breath,' Jisung whispered. 'I give my time for you breath. I give my time for your breath -'

_\- please -_

'- I give my time for your breath -'

- _take as many years as you need please -_

'- I give my time for your breath -'

\- _come back to me Felix -_

'- I give my time for your breath -'

\- _I want to know you -_

'- I give my time for your breath -'

_\- I want you to know me -_

'- I give my time for your breath -'

_\- I have never had anyone to know as my own -_

'- I give my time for your breath.'

Jisung finished the recitation the silence rolled in like the tide, smothering, implacable. He realised he was crying again, hot tears trickling down his cheeks.

_Please, Felix. You said you'd come back._

He blinked and a single tear splashed onto Felix's jaw, but they did not stir. Jisung bit his lip sharply, unintentionally digging his fingers into the skin of their chest, pressing more firmly against their mouth.

_Don't leave me here by myself, Felix. Please, please, come back to me._

And then he felt it, under his hand, a faint -

_ba-dump_

Jisung yanked his hand away from Felix's mouth, hope surging through his blood.

Their heart beat again and again and again and it did not stop. Then they jolted as though electrocuted and gasped for air, eyes flying open and the night sky shining in their gaze.

'Felix?' Jisung breathed, one hand still pressed flat to their chest.

They made no reply, their chest rising and falling unsteadily as they sucked in lungfuls of air, but Jisung felt a sudden weight on his shoulders, his skin prickling, and he knew they were watching him.

'Jisung,' they rasped. 'Jisung.'

He curled forward over them, uncaring of the tears that dripped freely from his lashes. 'I'm here, you're safe, I'm here,' he babbled, stroking his free hand down their temple to cup their cheek.

'Jisung,' Felix repeated, stronger now, overlapping his hand with their own.

'I was so scared, I never want to do that again,' Jisung mumbled, the words tripping off his tongue in an endless stream. 'Please don't do that again, Felix, please, I was so - so scared -'

'Shh, shh, it's alright,' Felix crooned, tangling their other hand with the one Jisung had on their chest. 'You've done so well, Jisung, so well. Thank you for being brave for me. It's alright now, I'm not going anywhere.'

Jisung leaned back as Felix tightened their abdominal muscles and effortlessly sat upright, unable to tear his gaze from their starry eyes.

'Beautiful,' he whispered, not realising he'd spoken aloud until Felix smiled.

'The stars shine bright for you,' they murmured, and he recognised the words as what they had said to him under the full moon.

They leaned in and kissed the tears from Jisung's cheeks, eliciting a startled hiccup from him. They smiled again, their posture relaxed, and it was Jisung who tilted his head to close the final whisper of distance between them. He tasted the salt of his tears and sighed against the warmth of their lips. Felix lightly held his jaw and softly, sweetly devoured him. So very gently, Jisung returned the favour, and the only sounds in the room were of their breath and of warm, sticky flesh pressing close and parting, pressing close and parting.

When at last they broke apart for more than a moment, Felix tipped their forehead against Jisung's and held his gaze, breathing heavily. 'The humans did not hurt you?' they queried.

'No,' Jisung panted, flicking his tongue out over their parted lips (Felix's breath stuttered) before continuing, 'They left hours ago, but I wasn't sure. I didn't trust them. So I waited.' He could not even begin to enunciate how much those hours had cost him.

Felix sighed, lashes fluttering down and up. 'Thank you, Jisung. They will not cease hunting, but now that they aren't snapping at my heels, I can return home.'

Jisung's eyes widened in alarm, but when he tried to pull away, Felix twined a hand in his hair and held him close. 'Felix -'

'I thought we would have more time,' they murmured regretfully. 'But I must go now or not at all. I cannot risk them finding my trace and following me home.'

'You're going to leave me, then,' Jisung said in a tiny voice, panic choking him ruthlessly.

Felix exhaled through their nose, then said, 'I had hoped that I would know you and that you would know me first, but it is not to be.' The stars in their eyes shone as they whispered, 'You must make your decision now, Jisung.'

'I- what?'

'I told you you would have a choice to make, didn't I?' they reminded him.

'Well - yes, but - what does it have to do with this?'

Felix laughed softly. 'Everything, Jisung. It has everything to do with it.'

He blinked, anxious confusion thrumming in his gut.

'I will say it plainly.' They licked their lips, suddenly nervous. 'Jisung. Would you like to come home with me?'

_'What?'_ Jisung squeaked, jerking his head back.

Felix pursed their lips, no laughter in their face now, hands curling together in their lap. And Jisung realised -

'You're serious.'

They nodded.

'You would - I don't even know where - how does - what - _what_ -'

'Do you know what my eyes show?' Felix asked quietly.

'Um... stars?'

'Yes. They show the stars of my family and my home.'

Jisung felt dizzy. 'You're -'

'I am.'

A star. Felix was _literally_ a star.

'Oh,' he said faintly.

'It is not as you humans perceive it. I cannot explain what it is to be a star. You can only experience it. But,' they continued, sitting up straighter, 'I think you would be happy with us there. It is... infinitely more wonderful than this world.'

And for all that Jisung thought he might pass out at any second for even _considering_ the possibility of such a thing - his answer was already on his tongue, waiting to be spoken.

'I am sorry that we haven't had longer,' Felix said, the distress in their tone making Jisung's heart hurt. 'I did not want to present this to you so soon, I know that humans require time to -'

'Yes,' Jisung interrupted, surprised that his voice didn't falter. 'I want to go home with you.'

'Oh,' Felix echoed, stunned. _'Oh.'_

A giddy sensation was starting to grow from the pit of stress and panic that had been accumulating in Jisung and he couldn't repress a wide grin, aware he probably looked a bit drunk. Or unhinged. Or both. 'I want to go home with you,' he repeated. 'If home is up in the stars, so be it. I don't care. Just -' his smile wavered, tone turning sombre - 'don't leave me behind. Please. Nothing would hurt more than that.'

Felix's expression was torn between shock and joy, and the stars in their eyes burned bright. 'If you really mean it,' they rushed out, 'then I shall never leave you alone again, Jisung.'

'I mean it,' he said firmly, heart pattering behind his ribs.

Felix beamed and took his face in their hands, their hold as careful and tender as ever. They always touched him like he was something important to them and Jisung's breath hitched.

'Our stars will be beside one another,' they promised, 'so you will have to put up with me for the rest of our existence.'

_Our existence._

Jisung blinked rapidly, determined not to cry for a _third_ time today. 'I'm okay with that,' he mumbled. 'So okay with that.'

Still beaming, Felix pressed a quick, delighted kiss to his mouth. 'Excellent. Are you ready to go, then?'

The enormity of what he was doing crept up on Jisung, threatening to spin him into panic again, but the night sky stared at him more warmly than he could ever recall a human doing and it anchored him.

'Yes,' he said. There was nothing he'd miss here, except perhaps the beauty of the land, but he was fairly certain this ridiculous, impossible, enthralling adventure he was about to embark on would make up for it. 'I'm ready.'

They hummed and then -

There was light, so much light -

But Jisung wasn't scared, not when he could feel Felix's hands on his face -

And then -

An d the n -

A n d th e n -

A n d t h e n -

\--

Astrologists all around the world scratched their heads and readjusted their telescopes and rubbed their eyes and gesticulated wildly and shouted at each other but none of them could give any explanation as to why two new stars had suddenly appeared high, high in the night sky. Eventually, they collectively shrugged their shoulders. The stars were there to stay, apparently, and there was precisely nothing that anyone could do about it.

**Author's Note:**

> can you believe this was meant to be 1k? apparently i don't know how to count. also it turns out that writing flat-out for weeks and then going cold turkey really doesn't work i.e. this work has been brought to you by my writing withdrawal symptoms (and one too many summer-induced escapism fantasies).
> 
> remember, kids - 1 kudos = 1 punch in a homophobe's face; 1 comment = 1 feral possum bite to a homophobe's ass.


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